rat petunia

Aug 16

Me [wearing twinset, holding laundry basket, shaking head as kids lap kitchen island on way out door]:
"As a busy mom, I know how important shortcuts can be. That’s why I make dinner and laundry a snap with new Cook-Dri™. Simply wrap one raw garlic clove in a dish towel, toss into the dryer with a full load of laundry, and walk away! Return an hour later to nicely-browned garlic and heavenly-scented clothing!"
[off camera: “Mom! We’ll be late for soccer!”]
Me [knowing nod, swiping keys from counter]: “Coming! Just starting dinner!”
Cook-Dri™: Dinner. Duds. Done.®

Aug 15

So glad my Target package arrived, despite the Zombie Apocalypse.

So glad my Target package arrived, despite the Zombie Apocalypse.

Parenting

1. Scream at teenage son.
2. See FB pics of cousin taking daughter to college.
3. Open first letter from high school college counseling office.
4. Cry.
5. Scream at teenage son.

Aug 10

Cowfloyd.

Cowfloyd.

Jul 29

Rare footage of the migratory species known as WABs (White American Beachgoers), retreating from their notable annual rite, The Holiday Greeting Card Photo Shoot. Members perform ablutions before appearing on the designated evening, donning traditional tribal dress of white tops (collared for men, modest scoop-neck for women) and khaki bottoms (pleated or flat-front, often embellished with colorful canvas belts). WABs then gather in an outward-facing, motionless cluster, rictuses frozen in an approximation of happiness, until, by tradition, a younger initiate begins to openly weep, or an elder (generally male) succumbs to cravings for scotch and a restroom.

Rare footage of the migratory species known as WABs (White American Beachgoers), retreating from their notable annual rite, The Holiday Greeting Card Photo Shoot. Members perform ablutions before appearing on the designated evening, donning traditional tribal dress of white tops (collared for men, modest scoop-neck for women) and khaki bottoms (pleated or flat-front, often embellished with colorful canvas belts). WABs then gather in an outward-facing, motionless cluster, rictuses frozen in an approximation of happiness, until, by tradition, a younger initiate begins to openly weep, or an elder (generally male) succumbs to cravings for scotch and a restroom.

Jul 28

Never a more mismatched pair than a husband/wife serially reading Game of Thrones/Jane Austen:

Rick: “&*#$%.” 

Me: “I’m sure you’ll QUITE forgive me, sir, if I insist you’ve GROSSLY mistaken my intentions in coming here, seeking only bedclothes and the indulgence of a sound night’s rest!”

My son is smiling on the inside.

My son is smiling on the inside.

Summer night babies.

Summer night babies.

Jul 25

Taking T1D to College! -

My awesome niece shares her tips for heading to college w/Type 1 Diabetes. Tons of great info for rising freshmen w/T1D!

Jul 24

Two can play this Summer game, kids. Want to annoy me? I’ll be singing the Les Miserables soundtrack in Barry Gibb voice until further notice.